Thursday, September 29, 2005

"The Most Spectacular Veto of All Time!"

"Dere will be none of those boy-on-boy touchings while I'm da governa!"

I'm just imagining, but I'll bet Schwarzenegger said something along those lines before he used the giant stamp marked veto on the Gay Marriage Bill presented to him. At least I'm assuming that's how vetoing works--that there's a big stamp marked 'Veto' that he applies to bills (here I'm assuming that a bill is like a packet of papers stapled together, perhaps with a nice header like "THIS ONE LETS THE 'MOS GET MARRIED").

I'd also venture to guess that, if such a stamp does exist, Arnold has probably stamped his assistant with it on the forehead in front of a crowd of people and laughed at how funny he is.

"It's almost as funny as Junior what I did. When I did da stamping on his head. From dis day forward I am no longer called da governator, now I am da funnernator!"

"You are vetoed! And you are vetoed! And you are vetoed! And my arm is vetoed. This lady's puppy is vetoed. My wife's skeletal body frame is vetoed. And all da gays in all da whole world are vetoed!"By the way, my internet Arnold Schwarzenneger impression is the cat's pajamas.

"Dis veto ting is da most fantastic power I've ever had. Even greater dan da time I could come out of da movie screen like in Last Action Hero or even greater dan da time I could turn anybody I wanted into ice as Mr. Freeze on one of da greatest blockbuster movies of all time, Batman & Robin."

"If you guys didn't know, all dat was done with movie magic. But dis veto, dis veto is not movie magic. It's real magic. By pressing it on a piece of paper and wishing very hard, I made all of da girly men into manly men."

"Forget da funnernator, I am da de-gayinator."

He's hilarious!

Pop Quiz of the Day:
Teddy Roosevelt is one of only two presidents to always sit down when he peed. Can you guess the other one?

1 comment:

David Amulet said...

Those who dislike the True Lies Governor should see it as karmic justice for all the Californians who bought tickets for the montrosity of film known as "Batman and Robin."

The other president to always sit down and pee? That's an easy one.

Geena Davis.

-- d.a.