Friday, January 28, 2005

Liberty and Freedom On the Outs!

In news that is sure to send shockwaves through the present American political system, Liberty and Freedom have separated.

The two recently made news in President Bush's Inaugural speech in which he referenced the two over forty times combined. Rumor has it, though, that Liberty was upset because Freedom was having an affair with Justice.

That is just speculation, however, and as recently as yesterday Freedom and Liberty were seen together once again when Condoleeza Rice managed to use each of them twice in the same sentence.

"I can't think of a better call than to say that America will stand for freedom and for liberty, that America will stand with those who want their aspirations met for liberty and freedom."

A spokesman for the two said that they will attempt to maintain their working relationship as President Bush had already made an appointment for them to appear in Iraq on the 30th. However, skeptics like Un (who rose to fame as the prefix) feel that this won't happen.

"It's highly unlikely that the elections are going to go smoothly. The people over there are crazy and uncivilized," he said, taking a drag from his Virginia Slim cigarette. "That'll be eighty dollars. Forty per un."

Not since the split of "Trickle-down" and "Economics" in the 80s has a separation had such an impact on the World. But, as we all know, Trickle-down remarried and became Trickle-down-Zeta-Jones-Douglas and President Bush had Economics murdered in front of the country at his first Inauguration in 2001.

Freedom and Liberty in happier times.

1 comment:

Katie said...

Such sad news! I wasn't expecting the breakup so soon - I should have had a box of kleenex next to me as I read this.

I found your blog by that magical "next blog" option at the top of the screen, and since finding it, I've read your archives all the way back to August already. Stalkerish, I know, but I think you're hysterical. Especially the post when you said, "Potato, potato. That really doesn't work in type." I laughed for a good 10 minutes over that. Ok, I'm done creeping you out. Just wanted to tell you I love your blog.