Thursday, December 08, 2005

Holo Back, Y'all!

The Holocaust is making headlines today. Finally, people are talking about it!

First, Mel Gibson's production company has announced that it's going to make a made-for-TV movie set during the Holocaust. If you remember, many people felt that the movie he made was anti-Semitic (that means it kills germs, like soap). Personally, I have seen Lethal Weapon a lot and if it's anti anything, it's anti-I'm-too-old-for-this-shit.

When The Passion of the Christ was first released by the Mel Gibson (if the Jesus gets an article before his name, so does the Mel) news came out that Gibson's father denied that the Holocaust happened. I never knew that the Mel's dad was the President of Iran (it does kind of make sense, though, he has a "the" before his name, too: "the President").

Because that motherfucker said today that he doesn't think the Holocaust happened and, to top it all off, said to move Israel to Europe. That's the guy that I'm going to take international affairs advice from. He seems to have done so well for himself up to this point. It's like asking Rosie O'Donnell the proper way to suck a dick. That just put an awesome mental picture in my head; thanks, me.

It always fascinates me when people deny that the Holocaust happened. It blows my mind. There is just so much evidence that it happened, like--oh, I don't know--the fucking people that it happened to and pictures and bodies and sad Jews. It reminds me of when a little kid gets caught shitting his pants and his parents call him on it.

"Gregory, did you just poopoo in your pants?"

"No."

"There's some doodie running down your leg, Gregory. Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Well, whose doodie is that then?"

"Yours."

"Mine? I dare you to fucking lie to me again, Gregory. I will hit you in the face with a scalding hot iron."

That's actually verbatim from my childhood. The name has been changed to protect the innocent (guilty shit-pantsers).

So the President of Iran not only denies the Holocaust, but he wants to move Israel to Europe. I think the poor Jews have had to move enough. They'll probably get lost in the desert again on the way to their new home. They're known for wandering around out there for-fucking-ever. You can't just move a country whenever you want. If this was the case, I would have moved Turkey next to Hungary when I was seven.

Interesting thought of the day:
Pilates, the exercise regimen sweeping the nation, is one bent 'l' away from pillaging and plundering your ass.

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