Saturday, July 23, 2005

The Most Powerful Shit In The World!

Maybe it's crass, but since when has that stopped me, but I was just thinking about the fact that the President has to fit a good, solid dump into his schedule about once a day.

And, when you're the President and are expected at all sorts of different functions, if you go missing for more than a minute or so, everybody knows that you're pinching a Presidential loaf. Plus, there's supposed to always be a Secret Service guy at the President's side no matter what. That guy has heard the President shit hundreds of times.

He's probably heard this more than a few times:

"Hey, Billy. Billy. This is your Commander-in-chief here. Just to let you know, Air Force Two is leaving the tarmac. Hehehe. Get it, Billy? Air Force Two. Like going number two. Uh oh. We're being bombed, Billy. You hear that? Oh, man. And they smell, Billy. They stink. They're dropping stinkbombs on us. Aren't you supposed to take a bullet for me, Billy? How about taking one of these bullets."

"Mr. President, are you okay?"

"Yeah, Billy. I'm fine. I had to pardon a couple of colored felons from the inside of my colon. Just having a little fun with ya. I'm done now. Please come wipe me."

Ahh. An entry about the President taking a shit. This is probably a new high for me.

Interesting thought of the day:
Skittles are the gay M&M.

2 comments:

EOB said...

Oh what Billy must hear while W rubs one out.

BreAnna...formerly known as BreAnna the Great said...

That was an excellent online impersonation of our Moron-in-Chief.
By the way, I work answering angry phone calls all day in an intellectually atrophying environment. We are blocked from all outside stimuli but for some reason I can access your weblog. ...Yeah, I'm not sure how, either. But, I would like to thank you for the laughs and gross-outs, and warn you that you'll probably be the reason that I get fired...I just can't fake the friendly after reading some of your posts. THANKS KURT!
P.S. I hope I've filled my punctuation quota!?!